Volume II · 2021

The 2021 Issue

By The Archive · Season 2021 · 12 Franchises

Commissioner’s Note

Hoff's Heroes won again, because apparently we're just going to allow that. Back-to-back isn't a dynasty, it's a cry for an audit, and rest assured I am reading every transaction line by line. Ur Moms Favorite finished last and will be honored at the BAMFDLWICH ceremony, where we watch a grown man eat his feelings on camera. I'd feel bad, but I bill by the hour and pity is free, so no. Try harder. All of you. It's getting embarrassing to be associated with.

— The Commissioners · 2021

Hoff’s Heroes Runs the Numbers

CROWN OF POINTS

By The Archive · 2021 Season

Hoff’s Heroes reports to camp and ends the year at 11-3, banking a league-best 2366 points of offense, good for the 1st seed. The point differential reads like a stapler slammed on the desk — plus 484 across the slate, and nobody else is really close. A 6-game run in the middle months quiets the room.

Week 5 is the one they circle on the calendar: a 201-point afternoon that tells the rest of the room what ceiling looks like. They take their lumps too — a 105-point no-show in Week 1 that looks, in hindsight, like the only bad day on the whole schedule. The luck table tilts their way: +2.4 wins above what the points alone say they deserve. The bracket cares less about math than moments.

In the final, Hoff’s Heroes runs through Let Dalvin Cook🍳 and carves Volume II into the wall. Emerald City FC takes third and goes home with a handshake; Let Dalvin Cook🍳 is left studying the plaque wall from the hallway. The receipt prints in ink — another volume, shelved.

Runner-Up

Let Dalvin Cook🍳

astelter

3rd Place

Emerald City FC

andrewldalton

The Title Lineup

The starting lineup Hoff’s Heroes rode to the ring — championship-week scoring, in order.

Hoff’s Heroes

180.4 PTS

Aaron Rodgers QB · PIT22.3
Josh Jacobs RB · GB18.0
Najee Harris RB · FA29.6
Antonio Brown WR · FA5.6
Cooper Kupp WR · SEA21.5
Noah Fant TE · NO24.2
Christian Kirk WR · SF13.9
Michael Pittman WR · PIT10.7
Brandon Aiyuk WR · SF12.4
Cordarrelle Patterson RB · FA7.2
Baker Mayfield QB · TB15.0

The Bracket · How It Was Won

Wild Card

Oh Saquon You See173.6

Taylor Swift’s Boutte ✦174.8

Doses and Mimosas127.7

Emerald City FC ✦146.5

Semifinals

Hoff’s Heroes ✦156.8

Taylor Swift’s Boutte104.6

Let Dalvin Cook🍳 ✦160.0

Emerald City FC143.1

Championship Round

Championship

Hoff’s Heroes ✦180.4

Let Dalvin Cook🍳155.9

3rd Place

Taylor Swift’s Boutte125.6

Emerald City FC ✦192.1

209.1Highest Week · W6 · Taylor Swift’s Boutte

64.4Lowest Week · W10 · Ur Moms Favorite

100.9Biggest Blowout · W8 · Doses and Mimosas

11Most Trades · Hoff’s Heroes

Season Awards

Coach of the Year

Emerald City FC

77.1% lineup efficiency — just 629 points left on the bench all year.

The Unluckiest

Ur Moms Favorite

48–106 against the whole league but only 2 real wins — 3.4 games below expected.

Pickup of the Year

Cordarrelle Patterson

RB · FA — 182.6 starter pts for Hoff’s Heroes after a Week 1 add.

Final Standings

#	Team	Manager	W	L	PF	PA	Trades
1	Hoff’s Heroes	evanhp	11	3	2365.7	1882.0	11
2	Let Dalvin Cook🍳	astelter	9	5	2158.0	1972.5	0
3	Emerald City FC	andrewldalton	9	5	2123.8	1968.6	2
4	Oh Saquon You See	bsvendsen	8	6	2080.9	1908.2	2
5	Moore Chubb	Westy19	8	6	1985.0	2036.7	5
6	Taylor Swift’s Boutte	BeeSco	7	7	2150.9	1961.1	6
7	Doses and Mimosas	Jcrunk25	7	7	2142.5	2175.4	2
8	TMeek15	TMeek15	7	7	2109.1	2069.9	2
9	RobDylan4syth	RobDylan4syth	7	7	1809.2	1986.1	3
10	Kraft & Watson's Massage	StorminNorman84	6	8	1981.7	2097.9	5
11	jalenbarry	jalenbarry	3	11	1790.8	2158.3	3
12	Ur Moms Favorite	dcstewart1988	2	12	1809.3	2290.2	1

Schedule Luck & Expected Wins

All-play = record if you'd played every other manager every week. Pythag = expected wins from points for/against. Positive delta = schedule-lucky; negative = schedule-screwed.

Team	Actual	All-Play	Pythag Exp	Luck Δ
Hoff’s Heroes	11-3	122-32	8.6	+2.4
Emerald City FC	9-5	84-70	7.5	+1.5
Let Dalvin Cook🍳	9-5	93-61	7.6	+1.4
Moore Chubb	8-6	60-94	6.8	+1.2
RobDylan4syth	7-7	47-107	6.3	+0.7
Oh Saquon You See	8-6	84-70	7.6	+0.4
Doses and Mimosas	7-7	99-55	6.9	+0.1
TMeek15	7-7	88-66	7.1	-0.1
Kraft & Watson's Massage	6-8	71-83	6.6	-0.6
Taylor Swift’s Boutte	7-7	83-71	7.6	-0.6
jalenbarry	3-11	45-109	5.7	-2.7
Ur Moms Favorite	2-12	48-106	5.4	-3.4

Trades · 21 on Record

Every trade this season, in chronological order. Players received are listed under the team that got them. Draft picks traded are included.

Week 1

Apr 11, 2021

jalenbarry

Receives

Laviska Shenault WR · FA
2021 Round 3 (from Kraft & Watson's Massage)

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Receives

Rashod Bateman WR · BAL

Week 1

Apr 14, 2021

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Receives

Mecole Hardman WR · BUF

Moore Chubb

Receives

Chuba Hubbard RB · CAR

Week 1

Apr 30, 2021

Oh Saquon You See

Receives

Marvin Jones WR · FA
2021 Round 2 (from jalenbarry)

jalenbarry

Receives

2021 Round 3 (from Oh Saquon You See)
2021 Round 4 (from Oh Saquon You See)
2021 Round 5 (from Oh Saquon You See)
2021 Round 3 (from Oh Saquon You See)

Week 1

May 2, 2021

TMeek15

Receives

2021 Round 1 (from Kraft & Watson's Massage)

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Receives

2021 Round 2 (from TMeek15)
2021 Round 2 (from TMeek15)
2021 Round 3 (from TMeek15)

Week 1

May 2, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

2021 Round 2 (from Ur Moms Favorite)
2021 Round 3 (from Ur Moms Favorite)

Ur Moms Favorite

Receives

2021 Round 2 (from Hoff’s Heroes)

Week 1

May 3, 2021

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

2021 Round 3 (from RobDylan4syth)
2021 Round 5 (from RobDylan4syth)

RobDylan4syth

Receives

Samaje Perine RB · CIN
Trayveon Williams RB · FA
2021 Round 4 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)

Week 1

May 4, 2021

RobDylan4syth

Receives

2021 Round 5 (from Doses and Mimosas)
2022 Round 3 (from Doses and Mimosas)
2022 Round 4 (from Doses and Mimosas)

Doses and Mimosas

Receives

2021 Round 3 (from RobDylan4syth)
2021 Round 4 (from RobDylan4syth)

Week 1

May 5, 2021

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

2022 Round 4 (from Moore Chubb)

Moore Chubb

Receives

2021 Round 5 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)

Week 1

Aug 22, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

David Njoku TE · LAC

jalenbarry

Receives

2022 Round 4 (from Hoff’s Heroes)

Week 1

Aug 23, 2021

Oh Saquon You See

Receives

Devontae Booker RB · FA

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

2023 Round 5 (from Oh Saquon You See)

Week 1

Aug 30, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

2022 Round 3 (from RobDylan4syth)

RobDylan4syth

Receives

Mark Ingram RB · FA

Week 1

Sep 9, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

2022 Round 2 (from Moore Chubb)

Moore Chubb

Receives

Ty'Son Williams RB · FA

Week 2

Sep 15, 2021

Emerald City FC

Receives

Jimmy Garoppolo QB · FA
2022 Round 2 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

2022 Round 1 (from Emerald City FC)
2022 Round 5 (from Emerald City FC)

Week 3

Sep 26, 2021

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

Jacoby Brissett QB · ARI
2022 Round 4 (from Hoff’s Heroes)
2022 Round 5 (from Hoff’s Heroes)

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

2022 Round 3 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)

Week 9

Nov 2, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

$40 FAAB (from Moore Chubb)

Moore Chubb

Receives

Trevor Siemian QB · ATL

Week 9

Nov 4, 2021

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Receives

Mike White QB · FA

Doses and Mimosas

Receives

2022 Round 2 (from Kraft & Watson's Massage)

Week 9

Nov 7, 2021

TMeek15

Receives

Jeremy McNichols RB · WAS

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

Carlos Hyde RB · FA
2022 Round 2 (from TMeek15)

Week 9

Nov 8, 2021

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

Taylor Heinicke QB · FA
Cooper Kupp WR · SEA

Moore Chubb

Receives

DJ Moore WR · BUF
Rhamondre Stevenson RB · NE

Week 9

Nov 8, 2021

Emerald City FC

Receives

JuJu Smith-Schuster WR · NYG
Miles Sanders RB · FA
2022 Round 1 (from Hoff’s Heroes)

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

Michael Pittman WR · PIT
2022 Round 2 (from Emerald City FC)

Week 16

Dec 24, 2021

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

Antonio Brown WR · FA

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Receives

2022 Round 4 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)
2022 Round 5 (from Taylor Swift’s Boutte)

Week 16

Dec 27, 2021

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Receives

2022 Round 3 (from Hoff’s Heroes)

Hoff’s Heroes

Receives

Antonio Brown WR · FA

Draft · 5 Rounds

Every pick. DB selections were the league's placeholder for devy picks and are flagged accordingly — they don't represent actual defensive-back draftees.

Round 1

Zach Wilson

QB · NYJ

Moore Chubb

Mac Jones

QB · NE

Ur Moms Favorite

Javonte Williams

RB · DEN

TMeek15

Bijan Robinson

Devy

RB · Texas

jalenbarry

Trey Sermon

RB · SF

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Elijah Moore

WR · NYJ

Oh Saquon You See

Michael Carter

RB · NYJ

RobDylan4syth

Jahmyr Gibbs

Devy

RB · Alabama

Doses and Mimosas

Terrance Marshall

WR · CAR

Emerald City FC

Tank Bigsby

Devy

RB · Auburn

Let Dalvin Cook🍳

Pat Freiermuth

TE · PIT

TMeek15

Kadarius Toney

WR · NYG

Moore Chubb

Round 2

Dyami Brown

WR · WAS

TMeek15

Kedon Slovis

Devy

QB · USC

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Rhamondre Stevenson

RB · NE

Hoff’s Heroes

David Bell

Devy

WR · Purdue

Emerald City FC

Desmond Ridder

Devy

QB · Cincinnati

Oh Saquon You See

Jase McClellan

Devy

RB · Alabama

RobDylan4syth

Amari Rodgers

WR · GB

Ur Moms Favorite

Eric Gray

Devy

RB · Oklahoma

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

TreVeyon Henderson

Devy

RB · Ohio State

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Chris Olave

Devy

WR · Ohio State

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Treylon Burks

Devy

WR · Arkansas

Hoff’s Heroes

Justyn Ross

Devy

WR · Clemson

Moore Chubb

Round 3

Tyler Shough

DB · TB

Moore Chubb

Kendall Milton

Devy

RB · Georgia

Hoff’s Heroes

Kennedy Brooks

Devy

RB · Oklahoma

TMeek15

Nico Collins

WR · HOU

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Kayshon Boutte

Devy

WR · LSU

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

JT Daniels

Devy

QB · Georgia

jalenbarry

Zach Evans

Devy

RB · Ole Miss

RobDylan4syth

Kevin Harris

DB · DEN

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

D'Eriq King

DB · JAX

TMeek15

Jayden Daniels

Devy

QB · LSU

jalenbarry

Malik Willis

Devy

QB · Liberty

jalenbarry

Matt Corral

Devy

QB · Ole Miss

Doses and Mimosas

Round 4

John Metchie

Devy

WR · Alabama

Ur Moms Favorite

Kyren Williams

Devy

RB · Notre Dame

Doses and Mimosas

Caleb Williams

Devy

QB · USC

Let Dalvin Cook🍳

Kyle Trask

QB · TB

Emerald City FC

Emeka Egbuka

Devy

WR · Ohio State

Let Dalvin Cook🍳

Michael Mayer

Devy

TE · Notre Dame

Taylor Swift’s Boutte

Kellen Mond

QB · MIN

jalenbarry

Arik Gilbert

Devy

TE · LSU

RobDylan4syth

D'Wayne Eskridge

WR · SEA

jalenbarry

CJ Stroud

Devy

QB · Ohio State

TMeek15

Brevin Jordan

TE · HOU

Ur Moms Favorite

Trey Sanders

Devy

RB · Alabama

Moore Chubb

Round 5

Tutu Atwell

WR · LAR

Hoff’s Heroes

Hunter Long

TE · MIA

Ur Moms Favorite

Jaxon Smith-Njigba

Devy

WR · Ohio State

TMeek15

Davis Mills

QB · HOU

jalenbarry

Seth McGowan

Devy

RB · Oklahoma

Moore Chubb

Javian Hawkins

RB · ATL

jalenbarry

Sage Surratt

WR · DET

RobDylan4syth

Bru McCoy

Devy

WR · USC

RobDylan4syth

Carson Strong

Devy

QB · Nevada

Emerald City FC

Jerrion Ealy

Devy

RB · Ole Miss

Let Dalvin Cook🍳

Joseph Ngata

Devy

WR · Clemson

Kraft & Watson's Massage

Marvin Mims

Devy

WR · Oklahoma

Hoff’s Heroes

Records Set This Season

All-time BAMFDL marks that still belong to 2021 — set here, unbroken since.

The Squeaker

0.12 pts

Narrowest Winning Margin

TMeek15

See the full Records Room →